A "Food poisoning diet" is what a lovely backpacker friend of mine told me was the best way to lose weight. Well, folks, that is what I have been on for the last week. OMG, I promise you that it is the worst diet I have ever had! Yes, I have lost weight, loads, and loads of kilos. I am not a voluptuous lady at the best of times, but now I just look like a bedraggled scrawny blonde sparrow!
It all started in the evening after having visited the Killing Fields near Phnom Penh. I went for supper, and I know without question that the culprit was the food I consumed, which I may add was pretty grim. If I had been alone, I would most probably have left it, but an exquisite looking young man approached my table and asked if he could join me! Now girls! When you reach Backpacker Granny's age, you realize that life is more about saying yesses than about saying no’s! Well almost! Ten minutes into the conversation I started to rethink my ideas on Yes and No! What the hell do I have that attracts all these weird and unfortunate people? It was working out he was a raving alcoholic, telling me he drank to give him the confidence to ask ladies like me if he could join them! He also informed me that he didn't eat, he just drank. Lucky bloody him! At least he would never get food poisoning! Anyhow after listening to all his wails of woe and stretching my attentions span to the limit. I finally managed to politely leave the restaurant including good looking unfortunate guy to scamper back to my hostel. Oh, gosh I forgot to mention that he wanted to come back with me to my hostel. Uuuf not a chance in heaven sweetie pie. They ain't exactly queuing up at my door, but I haven't reached that point of desperation YET. (Repeat YET)
I was looking forward to crawling into my little bed and watching the new DVD film that I had just purchased for the total sum of 1.50$ "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" Well I can tell you all, the only lousy dragon I encountered that night was the one in my stomach. Oh boy! he was letting me know in no uncertain terms. "It was his year."
Anyone who has ever had food poisoning in Asia knows the score. God! Firstly you feel sick, then you are sick and then sick again and again and again, followed by the waste disposal department going into a raging frenzy. In fact, on reflection, I honestly think that one almost doesn't even need a bed in the hostel. Just a "Loo" as that is where you will spend most of the next few days.
I was ill for a whole solid week and felt like I had been in fifteen rounds with Mike Tyson. Completely knocked out, shattered, no energy whatsoever and for the first time in many months missing Europe and its Mediterranean food.
A few bits of advice that I would give to any traveler who should fall ill through bacteria infected food. Soda water is far better than still water. Keep hydrated with the amazing rehydrating powder that they now sell in every chemist; Rehydration sachets contain rehydration salts consisting of sugars and salts (glucose, sodium chloride, potassium chloride and disodium hydrogen citrate) They are used to replace body fluids lost as a result of acute diarrhea. Only take anti-diarrhea if you absolutely must, as this will just mask the bacteria in the intestines but won't cure the ailment. Should the symptoms persist or you have a temperature, then please consult a doctor as it could be something more than food poisoning.
Well, that's all for now dear friends - I am still around to tell my stories. Traveling sometimes has a few lows, but they are nothing in comparison to all the highs!
I finally got to see my film, and it was awesome. Daniel Craig was as gorgeous as ever. There was Loads of gore. Torture. Sex and all the rest of the stuff that we all just love to see on the screen.
Don't miss my next blog. Fun in the backpacker's mixed dorms.